Stillness & My Massage Experience

An awesome friend gifted me with a one-hour massage. I was excited and nervous at the same time. To be honest, I am very ticklish. The thought of someone touching me feet FREAKED me out! But, I decided I would go for it.

When I saw the massage table for the first time something hit me like a ton of bricks: I HAVE TO TAKE OFF MY CLOTHES! I forgot about that small detail. So, I took a few deep breaths in the bathroom and decided I was boundand determined to enjoy this massage. Abby Lewis carefully directed me in the steps she would be taken, let me know in her smooth, calming voice that we could have talk about whatever topic we wanted to, and that I didn't need to be nervous. Right... I'm lying naked under a blanket, knowing at any moment she will be touching my feet, and there's no need to be nervous. Hmm..

That's where it ends folks! No, no the massage - my worry, stress, ticklish nerves, and ability to focus on anything but the heaven I was in at that present moment. Oh My Goodness! Not only did my feet survive, I was finding myself wondering how she could possible expect me to carry on a conversation. I was trying desperately not to drool!

Needless to say the massage was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! Thank you to Abby Lewis of A Breath In Stillness. Contact her today and book your massage.

You Never Know

Nicole Porter, 25, of Branson died Tuesday evening from injuries sustained in a serious car accident on Monday. I was sitting in class yesterday when I heard people telling various stories of the car accident story. I didn't pay much attention until they mentioned Nicole's name. The name sounded so familiar, then I remembered.

I used to work with her. When I matched her name with the face I immediately began to pray for her salvation. Why? The last time I saw Nicole she was roaming around lost in this dark world. The lifestyle choices she was making clearly indicated she wasn't following God's path.

I find myself saddened today, wondering if the opportunity ever presented itself for her to know God. I find myself saddened that she has two small children that no longer have a mother. I find myself grateful that when God pursued me I finally gave into him and stopped living the destructive lifestyle I was living. I am so lucky!

Pray for her family. Pray for her friends. Pray for the future of her children, and that all relish the opportunity to know The Lord.

Fighting To Win

So many thoughts fill my head at night.

As I lie in a quiet place.

The busyness of the day dies down, but my mind won’t rest.

I close my eyes and pray, but interruptions are soon to come.

Thinking of this, thinking of that, visuals that I don’t want.

A voice I know doesn’t belong within me, reminds me of so many things.

The strongholds that fill my life stir up inside me like fresh wounds from a battle.

I’m fighting – I am.

I’m fighting to win.

Yet that voice speaks again and again and again.

I cry out to Jesus to take my thoughts captive – suddenly they’re gone.

But just as fast as one thought leaves, another one comes.

Images I don’t want, yet they’re so clear in my mind.

Please leave me alone, please go away.

Lord, Jesus, please renew my mind.

I don’t ask for them, but they come anyway.

The worst of them at the end of the day.

Night is here, the dark has set.

I’m not scared, just lonely, wanting to forget.

They are lies, there’s no truth to words that voice speaks.

I will wake up tomorrow with the thoughts of my dreams.

But there’s another voice I hear, this one is true.

He’s given me a new day, a renewed mind, another chance to be pure.

Tomorrow brings light, a safe place for me.

Night will fall again and my thoughts will repeat.

Each day His strength grows through all of my weakness.

One day I’ll sleep with no thoughts that haunt me.

I wake up and say “Good things are to come.”

I believe, I see, I know His will be done.

God Is The Ultimate Hand Sanitizer

Is your soul healed, or have you temporarily medicated it, covering up the wounds for a short time?

Jennifer Rothschild says in Me, Myself, & Lies that when we are physically and emotionally spent and worn, we become susceptible to the Enemy’s attack. We become an easy target. As a result of a fatigued soul and body, our Enemy attacks with despair, depression, impatience, lies, and self condemnation. So it’s critical that we speak rest to our souls and stay connected.

As I was finishing up this study an amazing picture came to me.

When I get sick with a cold, sinus infection, something that requires medicine, I go to the doctor. He looks at my throat, shines the light in my eyes, and looks in my ears and nose. Then he diagnoses me and sends me home with a prescription for an antibiotic. The bottle clearly states to finish the medicine – take ALL of it. But I never do. I start to feel better and quit taking the medicine. I know I should continue to take it, but I store it away for a later date.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve watched this happen in my faith. Something happens that makes me spiritually sick. It could be physically, mentally or emotionally. I find myself crying out to God and begging him to help me. He does. He prescribes the perfect antibiotic to heal me – His Word. I wake up in the mornings craving it. I want to dig deeper into Scripture and find the answers that will heal me.

Then I start to find the answers. I apply them to my life. My soul starts feeling better. It’s not long before I put the antibiotic away and store it for later. I’m better now right? I should only take medicine when I’m sick. I seem to walk around with a smile, a healed soul, and a love for Jesus.

Then it starts again – the sickness. Something knocks me down. I catch the sad bug. I’m defeated, tired, depressed, impatient, full of lies and despair. It’s time to go back to the doctor. This time it’s not the flu. My soul is desparately in need of an antibiotic. It’s desparately in need for God’s Word – the ultimate medicine.

Do you ever have this problem? Why do we wait until we’re so sick that we’ve let the Enemy defeat us before we seek God? What if we continued that ultimate antibiotic everyday? What if we seek Him constantly instead of just when we feel we need Him to rescue us from despair?

Oh how I crave this! I want to wake up every day seeking Him; seeking His Word. Yet I put Him aside and stick Him in storage until I need Him later.

We get sick from many things, including germs. I can’t say we’ll never get physically sick. What if we could never be spiritually sick? I’m a huge fan of hand sanitizer. I use it often. God is the ultimate hand sanitizer. His Word is 100% germ free. If we dig into it, we can’t be sick – we can only be healed.

Let’s not wait until we’re in despair to cry out for healing. Let’s not wait until we feel like we have nothing before we ask Him for something.

What’s your prescription?

Investing In Faith, Friends, Family

This past week's teaching from Ted Cunningham at Woodland Hills Family Church was about faith, friends, and family out of 2 Timothy 1:1-7. He encouraged us to make stronger connections with the friends we have rather than going out and always looking for new ones. This was a great sermon for me because I found myself looking back at the changes in my life over the last few years.

Point #1 - Invest in a younger believer.

I remember writing in my journal about three years ago, asking God to send me a mentor. I need someone to walk along side me as a Christian. He certainly answered my prayers. Two years ago God put that more mature believer in my life. She invested time in our relationship. She invested love. She invested A LOT of patience. Many times in our walk over the last couple of years I have tried to push her away due to fear. But she never left. She kept pushing, even when I was ready to throw in the towel. She is the very one that first introduced me to 2 Timothy 1:7, which is a verse deeply embedded into my heart. I am so grateful for her investment.

Point #2 - Find Joy in a Friend, Not Circumstances

Ted asked a great question, "How do you measure a good friend?" His answer: "They want you to go higher in life than they do." That struck a chord in me. I have struggled in the past, and more so recently with this very issue. I'm learning that it's truly difficult to find "real" friends that want to watch you succeed, even if their success looks very different. I could have focused on how others have done that to me, but I chose to take a deeper look in me and figure out what I could change; how I could support my friends better. I want them all to know I am totally and completely for them.

Point #3 - Model Sincere Faith for Your Family

I have had the opportunity to watch this in the very woman who has invested in me as a younger believer. Her husband is her number one priority, next to her relationship with Christ. I must admit, I don't always understand when she starts speaking marriage mumbo jumbo, but I tend to make mental notes in the back of my mind, reminding myself I'll probably need this advice later when it's my time for marriage. She fights for her family and it's very inspiring.

Catch the sermon if you haven't gotten a chance yet: Dear Son II:Part 1 - Faith, Friends & Family

Did You Know? Not For the Faint at Heart...

Did You Know?

• The #1 fear of most parents today is that their children will be abused and/or kidnapped. Thousands are abducted and disappear daily.
• Hundreds of thousands of young women and children in the United States and around the world are being sold as sex slaves.
• Atlanta, Georgia is the #1 city in the Nation for child sex trade - little girls as young as 11 are abducted, sold into prostitution, and forced to perform sexual acts for profit.
• Sex Slave Trafficking is the fastest growing criminal industry in the world. Billions of dollars are profited yearly.

Today I made a new friend, Rebecca from Rahab's Rope. Rebecca had an inspiring story to say the least. At 60 years old God called her into this ministry to help rescue girls from human trafficking. Rebecca sold everything she had, except for her car and devoted the rest of her life to helping these women. In Mark 10:21 Jesus said, "Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." Rebecca did just that.

Rebecca told me some saddening news today. She told me the United States is the third largest human trafficking location in the world. Am I the only one that makes sick? We are the United States of America! We are supposed to stand on Freedom. We are supposed to be the richest nation in the world. What is happening to the world today?

She told me the story of a 10-year old girl abducted on the corner of a small Georgia town who was sold into sex slavery and raped up to 40 times per day. Her innocence was completely taken from her. We ended the conversation with a smile and a friendly goodbye. I walked to my car. I ate lunch. I chit chatted with friends. Meanwhile, some innocent girl is being abducted and forced into a world of crazy darkness.

For more information on the sex trafficking industry and what you can do to help, visit their website for more information.

The above information was researched from the Internet, the Atlanta Journal Constitution, and the Salvation Army website.

Is Nashville That Desperate?

A song came on the radio today that left me speechless. I know, that's rare.

The lyrics start out like this:

I havent been to church since I don’t remember when
Things were goin’ great ‘til they fell apart again
So I listened to the preacher as he told me what to do
He said you can’t go hatin’ others who have done wrong to you
Sometimes we get angry, but we must not condemn
Let the good Lord do His job and you just pray for them

Sounds good at first glance eh? Read the rest:

I pray your brakes go out runnin’ down a hill
I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I’d like to
I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls
I pray you’re flyin’ high when your engine stalls
I pray all your dreams never come true
Just know whereever you are honey, I pray for you

My question: Is Nashville seriously that desperate for artists?

Dream A Little Dream

There's this girl. She has this burning passion for life inside of her. Sometimes she wonders if others can see it. Sometimes she wonders why others can't understand it when she explains it. Creativity fills her mind up so much that she often can't get it all out before she forgets what she was thinking.

She lives in the city. Her loft apartment is filled with vibrant colors of yellows, oranges, reds, greens. She comes home everyday to one big open space. Black and white pictures of her family and friends adorn the red brick wall separating her kitchen and living area. She comes home from an amazingly fulfilling day at work and props her feet up on the coffee table with sushi in her lap.

It's still daylight outside - time for a leisurely walk with her dog. The city surrounds her. Bookstores, coffee shops, bistros. Her choices are endless. Okay, maybe one Starbucks Frozen Mocha won't hurt.

It's time to end the day. Tomorrow will start again soon. As she tucks herself into bed she smiles at the beautiful photo of her mother staring back at her from the night stand. A wave of the homesick blues takes over her as she lies her head on the pillow.

Then I wake up.

As I spent the weekend in St.Louis I found myself thinking these thoughts over and over again. I have always dreamed of living the city life, yet I can't imagine leaving the country life. As I stood in line for the Metro Link I thought to myself, I think I could do this. Sometimes I wonder if it's just a dream or part of God's plan.

I have never done things ordinary. As my best friend puts it, "Your circumstances have never been ordinary; they've always been extraordinary." She's right. So, here's what I'm thinking: I could find my "spot" in the woods somewhere and just build a big metal building with my dream loft. It could be my city in the woods. I thank God for dreams and creativity. It keeps me going.

His Good & Perfect Gifts

I have experienced many things this past weekend – more than I’ll probably remember to put in this blog. Isn’t that awesome? When you have so many blessings in three days that you’re not sure if you’ll remember to write them all down?

My amazing best friend Jammie gifted me with tickets to the Joyce Meyer Love Life ’10 Conference in St. Louis for my birthday. I expected to have a good time, but God went beyond my expectations. The Devil tried to play and he FAILED.

On the four hour road trip to St. Louis from Branson I had the opportunity to enjoy laughter and great conversation with a friend who at a point in our lives wondered if our friendship would survive. There was authentic, genuine, forgiving love in that car. I was reminded of how great God’s grace was and how blessed I am to have her in my life.

We arrived at the conference to learn that others from my hometown were there. What could have been awkward for me, God turned into wholeness and peace in my soul. The wife of one of the men who sexually abused me was sitting next to me. I could have made two choices: don’t make eye contact and avoid conversation, or embrace her and let her see Jesus in me. I chose the latter. I stood in the Edward Jones Dome with 17,000 women listening to Darlene Zschech praise God with her amazing voice and tears streamed down my face as I felt freedom – true freedom. At that moment I realized I was no longer tied down to my past.

Not only that, but the first night of the conference 2,143 women stood up and gave their lives to Christ. That’s more than the population of my hometown of 1200! I was seriously lucky enough to witness that. Joyce Meyer Ministries gave away a new van, a $20,000 home renovation, makeovers, gift cards, and more. Words cannot describe what I was blessed enough to experience. You must go next year and see for yourself.

Joyce brought conviction to me as she asked, “If you can’t overcome a piece of pie, how will you overcome the devil?” John Maxwell had me wondering if I should have worn a Depends. Natalie Grant brought me to a deeper level of praise than I had experienced in a long time. Dr. Caroline Leaf reminded me that I am in control of my brain.

A man standing on the street reminded me just how cruel the world could be. As he began speaking to me and Jammie, he couldn’t stop stuttering. Then he stopped and said, “Please don’t laugh at me.” No one was laughing. We had the privilege of praying with him and embracing him. As I walked back into the air conditioned hotel room he was still standing in the street. Oh how lucky I have it!

God has shown me lavish love lately. I haven’t deserved it, yet He’s given it to me anyway. Every good and perfect gift I got this weekend was made possible by my Father in Heaven, whom I am so grateful to know.

Priorities

So, as an intern at Table Rock Freedom Center I still have the privilege of receiving weekly sessions with the director, who by the way, is one cool chick.

Each week I sit down and talk about what I worked on the past week and what I want to improve on for the upcoming week. Last week's topic was my priorities. I explained to Kim that I wasn't sure if God was coming first. When I'm trying to process things out, instead of talking about them one on one, I write them out, then we discuss what I have written.

So, here's some questions she asked me to answer:

1. If you're putting God first in your life what does that look like?
2. Are you doing what is necessary to put Him first?
3. If so, what would He say?

I have reflected on this over the last week and here's the conclusion I have come to:

I don't always put God first in my life, but I'm trying. Everyday I mess up, but everyday I grow one step closer to Him. I have been beating myself up lately thinking I wasn't doing things the right way in the way I should seek a relationship with Him. But I think I've been looking at it the wrong way. How I seek God isn't how everyone else does.

I try to start every morning off with Him, whether that's reading the Bible, journaling, or simply praying. Some mornings I wake up with the intention to read His Word, journal and pray. But I find myself cozying up to the pillows, praying to Him for people, places, and things as I drift back and forth into consciousness between the snooze button. Guess what? That's okay. It's okay!

Step One For Me: Stop being so hard on myself.

What does the necessary in question two look like? There's not a handbook. What's necessary for me is to go to Him with EVERYTHING. Necessary is making sure I talk to him everyday, whether that's in the shower, driving to class, playing the guitar, or simply playing a game of Sorry with friends. I talk to him all the time - that is necessary for me. What's necessary for me is not spending a disciplined one hour every morning diligently praying, although I love it when He calls me to do so.

Step Two: I don't have to be like everyone else.

What would God say?

I love you Sundi Jo. I love you with an everlasting love. You are not perfect, therefore you need me. Apart from me, you can do nothing. I will give you the strength you need for ALL things. Continue to trust me. Continue to talk to me, even when you're mad - even when you aren't making sense. I can make sense of everything you think. Fix your thoughts on me. Don't give up. Continue to follow in obedience. Take one step at a time. Take one day at a time. I am sanctifying you. I love you when you're happy, mad, sad, angry and overjoyed. Watch your pride and do everything possible to stay humble. Stay in my Word. Don't try to make sense of it all at once - I will give you what you need when you need it. Did I mention I love you?

Tweet for Tat

So, I’m going to be blogging more in depth about the Joyce Meyer Conference, but for now here’s what I’ve got to say:

AWESOME!

God showed his favor to me in more ways than one. My family has looked at me with the “deer in headlights” look many times as I have mentioned the word Twitter. “What is that?” I would try to explain it to them, but it was like speaking a foreign language.

This weekend my amazing friend Jammie brought me to the Joyce Meyer Love Life ’10 Conference in St. Louis. It was amazing to say the least – more details to come.

As I sat there and tweeted the conference I knew Jammie, a common Facebooker, but nothing more, thought I was crazy. I was right. She was wondering how I could possibly be getting anything out of the conference because as she puts it, “I wouldn’t get my eyes off the Blackberry.” Her opinion soon changed.

My tweets paid off. We both got the opportunity to hang with some amazing Social Media peeps from Joyce Meyer Ministries. Not only that, but I got some cool gifts to go with it, as if watching one type away on the Ipad, one with his eyes fixed on Hootsuite, and one filling up memory card after memory card with pictures wasn’t enough. I was in Social Media heaven! Another cool point – these were really some Jesus lovin’ people!

The moral of the story? Never underestimate the power of a tweet.

Register now for next years 2011 Love Life Women’s Conference – you don’t want to miss it!

For recent tweets on the Joyce Meyer Conference click here.

Using Our Lips To Glorify Him

What are your lips saying today? Are they glorifying God or putting man down?

Tired, But Good

Today I am tired. But it's a good sort of tired. It's that I've been so filled up with the grace of God this weekend that I need to rest and bask in what He has done for. I need to nap and be energized with all I have absorbed this weekend. I don't want to write too much about it now, because I am planning another blog.

God showed me so much favor this weekend. He blessed me with an awesome friend who gave me the greatest birthday gift. He blessed me with the opportunity to see if forgiveness was something I had really done. He let me meet the Social Media peeps of Joyce Meyer Ministries. He gave me gifts.

Then, today at church he blessed me with a guitar. He blessed me with a CD. He blessed me with friends and family that love me, and I thought it was just going to be a typical, average Sunday. It wasn't. God is awesome! Looking forward to seeing what He has up his sleeve next.

Exercise Two - I Believe Essay

As I looked through students’ blogs for ideas on the I Believe essays, I couldn’t find much. Did people complete the assignments or am I missing something? So, I decided to go with the examples on Mrs. A’s blog.

I’m in love with the music credo. It’s truth. Music constantly causes me to step out of my secret place. When I’m feeling sad there is nothing like some Dolly Parton to cheer me up. When Chris Tomlin is cranking out the lyrics to “Amazing Grace” I can feel God right next to me I can get into some serious worship.

Not only do I love to listen to music, I love to write songs. I am not the world’s greatest guitar player by any means, but I love to strum the strings and write my heart out. Music makes me feel free. I love to hear it. I love to watch it. I love to read about it. I love it!

Music tells a story. There are so many songs I can relate to for different reasons. “My Redeemer Lives” makes me stand up and sing praises to God. “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy” speaks truth to me about this crazy world we live in. Now, this is my opinion, but it has to be true – Country Music is God’s music.

Music can be my escape from reality. It can bring me back to reality. It is my therapy. It is a necessary part of life.

Pre-Writing Credo Exercise

I believe there is a strength beyond what I can possibly know. I believe I can no longer function on my own accord. I am done trying. I want strength. I want peace. I want compassion. I want mercy. I want forgiveness. I want love. I want to love others. I am not capable of doing it on my own. I have learned and know it to be true that I can do nothing without the strength of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I have tried. It is when I stopped trying to do life on my own and let Him take over that I truly began to live life.

Customer Service At Its Finest.

Today I witnessed customer service at its finest. I swear drama never stops finding me. I get a phone call from my mom this morning to say that I needed to go with her to the hospital to pick up three children whose mother was in the emergency room. This lady was a complete stranger and I'm going to pick up her children?

The short version of the story: It was a sister of a friend of the family. She was vacationing in Branson with just she and her three children. My mother gets a frantic phone call and offers to go pick up the children.

Now comes the cool part. We show up at the ER to find the resort manager herself and another employee stretched out on the floor with three car seats, a baby, a two year old, a one year old, and Sonic breakfast. I bet this is not what they had planned for their day. She held two small kids who she didn't know from Adam in her lap while the other sweet woman rocked the precious baby girl. Then they jumped in my lap. We got along well, being as though we act about the same age. I got an excuse to watch cartoons today!

What inspired me the most though was the willingness of these employees to go above and beyond the call of duty. They didn't have to take care of those children, but they chose to. They didn't have to stop by and spend their own money to buy breakfast for three hungry children, but they did. That's customer service.

For anyone planning a trip to Branson I recommend Wyndham-Branson at the Falls. Though I have never stayed at their resort, I believe they have their priorities in line regarding the safety and well being of their customers. If they are willing to spend four hours with three strange children, can you imagine what the complimentary breakfast is like?

Stop by Wyndham-Branson at the Falls and tell Becky Guthrie, the resort manager, that she and her employees are some pretty awesome servants!

Just Keep Waiting

Do you ever have those moments where you wait for something so long you finally just come to terms with the fact that it will never happen? The older you get the more you move it to some empty shelf space in the back of your mind to collect dust. You see it every now and again when you do some spring cleaning, but there it sets, still on the shelf.

Tonight that moment came for me. As I sat in regret over the Doritos and French Onion dip that I had eaten, my guilt was rising up inside. Condemnation was written all over me. Then I got the call.

My grandpa, who I hadn’t spoken with or seen in a year was calling me. I didn’t recognize the number on the caller id or I probably would have dropped the phone before having the chance to answer it. “Do you know who this is?” he asked. I knew immediately – his voice is pretty recognizable. I didn’t know what to say. “This is your long lost family down in God’s Country,” he said. Then he said he saw some pictures of me and couldn’t believe it was me.

Then came words I never expected from a man whose approval I wasn’t sure I would ever receive. He thought I was pretty. He couldn’t believe those pictures were me. “I’m proud of you.”

That dusty shelf in my mind was clean and looked as good as new. My waiting days were over. One of the things I wanted so badly that I had almost given up on had just actually happened. God knew exactly what I need at exactly His right timing.

He’s good like that, and I have one more shelf in my dusty old mind cleaned off. Thank you Jesus!

Assignment 4.4 – Know Your Audience Analysis Blog Post

I am writing to a wide variety of personalities in this course. There are book lovers, cereal fans, crayon enthusiasts and dessert fanatics.

“What is your favorite crayon?” really caught my attention. It is certainly not a question I would have thought of. Comparing a crayon color to visuals of nature really makes you get creative. I enjoyed going deep in my thoughts with answering that question.

I thought my own question, “What does freedom mean to you?” was creative in itself. Some of the answers I received told me that there are some great thinking folks in English 101. I didn’t expect too much detail on the question, but one student took me by surprise. He started his reply by acknowledging our American history and how freedom incorporates into that thanks to Thomas Jefferson. Then he tied it all together with Jefferson’s love for God, which answered the true underlying question I was asking, “What does freedom in Christ look like?”

My writing style is not affected by the other students in my audience. I will continue to write just the same as before. My goal is to be authentic and inspire others in the process. Well, I’m not sure I can say it won’t be affected. That comment takes me back to the crayon questions. Perhaps it will challenge me to think outside of the box more. I love visuals, but believe I can be reserved in my thoughts. I think I could stand to dig a little deeper in the mind and let out that creativity I know exists.

It’s hard being in class with students whom I’ve never officially “met”. But the opportunity to get to know their thoughts more made it a little more interesting. It gave me the opportunity to put something with the face I may or may not ever see.